This page and those to follow contain individual points of view only.

The content here is not intended as anything more than good natured banter so if it offends you please ring 555-grow-a-brain

General ramblings with Sgt Chuck Fart

It is with great despair that I walk past stores daily that have photos of males in clothing that can be described as questionable at best. I hesitate to use the term men as these characters certainly do not resemble any men that I know!

What I find most concerning is that apparently, according to advertising companies women find these 'men' attractive with their chicken wing arms, hairless chins and legs, legs that couldn't push a broom let alone a bike with a flat tyre. My son looks at these pictures of limp wristed gender confused boys and is led to believe that this is the image he should aspire too HAH!!.

According to many formal studies conducted at several revered centres of learning (see University for you less linguistically gifted hahaha) when women are asked what they look for in a mate one of the major responses is they must be tall and strong! that's not to say that there isn't a place for short weak men after all someone needs to serve the drinks. Now where was I? ah yes tall strong men, this goes to the very heart of female primal survival instinct as a strong mate produces strong offspring after all. So if this is actually true why are we bombarded by images of soft-cocks in paisley shirts and told this is the way men should look.

I am sure at some stage you have been informed by your wife/missus/girlfriend/lover/bit of stuff/squeeze or indeed old lady (You will note I did not say partner when referring to the woman in your life, this I will not do. Because unless you are in business you are not partners and no amount of mamby pamby crap talk is going to convince me otherwise) that you should buy some nice clothes so you can look decent and that you should maybe get a haircut, trim your beard and god forbid have a manicure then you too can look like a 100kg tosser with a mid life crisis. If I want a mid life crisis I will not go on a reality TV show and try to reinvent myself (in 10 days) but rather buy something worthwhile like a years supply of bourbon and a new bike, hell I might buy em and use em both at the same time.

Some call me a grumpy old man and for that I say if, when you say grumpy you mean honest then right on. I hate young guys having their jeans hanging down so far I can see the skid marks in their designer jocks. I am not real big on beautiful women having their faces harpooned so they look like a Japanese fisherman's lunch. I object to being told that I should be sensitive of others feelings when their very presence offends me. I hate 'Rock Spiders' and detest anyone that defends them.

Look I may not be the sharpest tack in the tool box and I may tend to ramble but I have every right to do so (they're my comments after all) I will in the future pick specific topics and write about them, don't expect poetry or literature but you can expect honesty and frankness, within reason after all there are people out there that go to Law school just so they can argue free speech and then sue you for using it.

Till next time, keep the rubber side down keep ya bags dry and remember


Back | Home